This is such a pivital time. I can feel it. I can feel the forces around me. I feel the good on one side encouraging me, pushing me forward into all this excitement and growth that God has in store for me. But there is another force as well. It isn't on the opposite side whispering mischief in my ear. No, it coils around me feet, slithering its way closer and closer feigning disinterest, all the while enticing me closer to its darkness. You would think the choice would be simple. Light=good, dark=bad. But simple isn't easy. Because the dark doesn't whisper chaos and evil plots. It just puts flashbacks in my mind of memories of pain and mistakes. It reminds me of my shortcomings and recounts every sin. It makes it sound like it is doing me a favor by helping me to back out before i try to get in too much over my head. Makes it seem like it is protecting me by pushing me back in the shadows where i wont embarrass myself too much. But growth isn't in the shadows. Darkness stunts growth. It sees that i have caught on to his scheme, maybe a little too quickly for his liking so he tosses something else out in the open. It is called life. Or rather a busy life. Because it isn't enough to have a full life. You don't get caught in webs of lies and deceit traps with a full life. It is a busy life that starts to complicate things. So he throws the busy line out. Because when life gets busy we get careless, we get heartless, we get Godless. Bingo. So here i am. I am not being pulled like in a tug of war with the forces of good and evil each on a side trying to each win me over. I am being guarded by the good forces while the dark darts around planting traps and holes and detour signs. I guess this is why we are told to be on our guard. Why we are told to stand firm. Why we are told to know the reason for the hope we have. Because satan isn't sitting in a dark corner trying to bribe us over to his side of the room. He is on the playing field disguised as the umpire. He is playing the game. We need to step up our game. Or maybe just maybe we need to finally get in the game.